This, Our Valley

Compassion is … a spirituality and a way of walking through life. It is the way we treat all there is in life – ourselves, our bodies, our imaginations and dreams, our neighbors, our enemies … Compassion is a spirituality as if creation mattered. It is treating all creation as holy and as divine … which is what it is. – Matthew Fox

In almost every world religion, and from the lips or writings of almost every major world-class figure in spirituality, one reads what is often referred to as the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.

We teach our children from early on not to hit their siblings or neighbor pals because “you wouldn’t want them to hit or bite you, would you?”

With such a small lesson we teach such a large principle: that people are to be treated with dignity and respect.

Over time, of course, we teach them that there are exceptions to the rule. When a child hits our child, we may well teach them to set aside the golden rule for a moment and “protect yourself." It isn’t too far down the slippery slope where we find ourselves rationalizing that it is OK to “don’t get mad” but “get even."

Spirituality is fine and good, it seems, when everyone is behaving properly, but it doesn’t take much to identify multiple exceptions to the rule.

We have heard it said, “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth,” but Jesus tells us to turn the other cheek, and if one tries to take our coat, to offer him our cloak, and if one would compel us to go a mile, go an extra mile!

That is very counter-intuitive advice, and not very practical.

Was Jesus crazy? Was he really that out of touch with human nature and the inordinate capacity of some people to take absolutely every advantage one gives them? Didn’t he know that when you give someone a second chance that they’ll want a third, and that if you draw the line anywhere, they’ll resent you for it and hate you for it – and probably forever?

I don’t believe Jesus was crazy; I think he had something else in mind; he was addressing a world where compassion was in woefully short supply; he had two people under consideration as he spoke: “you” and “the other.”

Our very own humanity is bound up in the humanity of the other person. Their ill treatment of us or of our property has nothing to do with how we ought to respond or behave, except to respond to the other person as a human being, whom God requires us to treat with dignity and respect; not because they have done so to us, but because that is how we must treat them if we are to retain our own humanity, and keep our own spiritual connection with God healthy, alive, and well.

While there are bad people in the world, they are probably fewer than we would like to admit. It has been said that every person is the hero in his or her own story. If that is true (and I believe it is), then we need to understand that the thoughts and actions of others are a function of their own heroic perspective; we tread on dangerous ground when we presume our own thoughts or actions are innocent and heroic, while imputing evil motives to those with whom we may be at odds.

Taking a moment to view the hero in the other person, even when we would most like to punch their lights out, allows us to see where we may have fallen woefully short of our own humanity, and of how we may have contributed to the mess we’re in. Taking our responsibilities seriously, we may find the time we need to make amends and prevent further violence to those God calls us to love.

Perhaps it is time to ponder anew the golden rule and see if it doesn’t result in a bit more peace and joy in this, our valley. I’m sure we would all find that nicer to look at than a bunch of smug neighbors stumbling around half-blind and toothless. At least “eye” would hope so – and that’s the “tooth”.

Keith Axberg writes on matters concerning life and faith. He can be reached at kfaxberg@gmail.com.